Thursday, 28 August 2014

What are words worth?

“Lessons have been learned” Where, once, honourable men found wanting would have fallen on their swords, now the catch-all ‘lessons’ serves as a deflection, certain that the attention will soon go away and those culpable, whatever injustice has been perpetrated, will be free to carry on just as before… with higher salaries. In the past few years we’ve learned lessons about immigration, about policing, about ‘institutional racism’ about climate, er ‘thingy’ (nobody knows) and all sorts of fluffery, none of which lessons appear to have been put into practice.

Authorities “deeply regret” without actually making reparation and recognise “failures of leadership” while steadfastly keeping said leadership in post. Rotherham council’s chief executive even acknowledged that child protection services “…fell some way short of today's standards…” I have no doubt they will soon announce an intention to engage in “reviewing our procedures”  This isn’t even Newspeak, it is non-speak; a fear to ever tell the truth, admit blame or lift a damned finger to put things right. It is lying codified; packaged for retail and sold on masquerading as action.

“Unfortunately, on this occasion, you have not been successful” is the trite phrase which greets an inadequate today and the utterly useless “did not achieve” has to do the difficult job that only the word FAIL can properly do. Some people need to be told they are no good at a thing; that they should stop wasting their time and that of others in struggling to master a skill for which they have no aptitude. But no, in the all-must-have-prizes culture, failure is all too often dressed up as partial success and abject failure is pretty much always somebody else’s fault. "Society is to blame."

We no longer have bosses and workers, calling them ‘associates’ instead and the average chain pub now has more ‘assistant managers’ than it has pint glasses. Barrista? Behave; coffee, white, two sugars please… and stop with all the fucking about. The sculpted foam on top of your over-priced indulgence is emblematic of form before function and this Emperor’s New Clothes trick perfectly mirrors the way those who seek office rarely do so for the reasons they say. What you see is not what you get and it is rarely worth the price.

So, you can shove your “misplaced racial sensitivity” and shelve your “mistakes have been made” where the sun don’t shine. Until you stop calling this gruesome invasion ‘multiculturalism’ and convening obfuscating focus groups run by party apparatchiks to prevent yourselves hearing what people have actually been telling you for years in plain English, nobody in Britain will have any faith in anything you have to say. Actions speak louder than words? Prove it.

Wednesday, 27 August 2014

Whose Equality is Best?

Raaaacists! Fear of a word appears to have prevented police and social services and anybody with a duty of care to minors from reporting, warning or even noticing child-rape and trafficking on an industrial scale in Rotherham. The total population of Rotherham (known) is around 260,000. About 35% are under fifteen – that’s 91,000 and in that part of the world a good 50% of school attendees are of the Asian community. Which leaves around 45,000 white kids. If two-thirds of them are under ten, that leaves about 15,000 of both sexes between the ages of ten and fifteen. So, 7,500 white girls, 1400 of whom have been preyed upon by sexual savages.

Okay the numbers are a tad (and deliberately – I can use those tactics too) skewed for effect but come on, 18% of Rotherham’s non-‘ethnic’ girls systematically abused for a decade or more? If this isn’t a primitive and hateful racism you’ll have to go a long way to convince every parent in the area who has been branded a bigot for raising concerns about the deliberate swamping of their region with ‘diversity’. As Allison Pearson said, “Let’s have no more of this coy “Asian males” crap. Muslim men of Pakistani origin…” are responsible for this. And their community is responsible for allowing it.

Even taking islam out of the equation – and it is about time somebody did just that – this is exactly the sort of thing that was feared by many, decades ago, when it became clear that allowing in one single worker soon opened the floodgates to a multi-generational wave of dependents who came here, failed to integrate and slowly set about seeding their third-world culture on our fertile national petri dish. Nurtured by leftists and feted by Labour, here (they thought) was the answer to people growing up and voting Conservative. All that lovely, progressive diversity.

But you can never have both diversity and equality; it doesn’t work. Even on simple linguistic grounds it makes no sense – one is practically an antonym of the other - if things are different they can’t be the same. Now you may not believe that some people are better than others but that’s nonsense because you definitely know that some are worth so much less. Pick a measure: Wealth, productivity, gregariousness, reason, intellect, muscle, looks, longevity… no matter what your metric we don’t all balance on the fulcrum.

Rotherham’s known problems were ignored or suppressed for the sake, so they said, of ‘social cohesion’; it was deemed racist to protect one culture against the incursion of another. Exactly how much fuck-witted doublethink had to be deployed in deciding which culture was to be neglected? Or was the indigenous Brit so obviously worth much less than the precious new diversity?

Come to Britain - it's a free country!

But here’s the thing; what of the honest immigrant who came to Britain to find a better life? What happened to their dreams of a new beginning away from the grinding poverty and oppressive religious medievalism of their overcrowded homelands? With the shallowness of thought typical of left-wing moralists can they even begin to admit that in pitting one culture against another they have comprehensively fucked it up for both? 

Tuesday, 26 August 2014


Big fleas have little fleas upon their backs to bite ‘em. And little fleas have lesser fleas and so, ad infinitum.” So goes The Siphonaptera and continues: “And the great fleas, themselves, in turn, have greater fleas to go on; While these again have greater still... and greater still, and so on.” The popular children’s version of the verse is based on the wit and wisdom of the satirist Jonathan Swift whose barbed words skewered and continue to prick the pomposity of those who assume positions of great power.

Pretty much wherever you are in the spectrum of humanity you will have fleas to feed upon your blood and the more insignificant the flea, the greater their number and the more voracious their appetite. It’s a cycle repeated since the dawn of time, since dinosaurs stalked the land, and Richard Attenborough was a young man. As John Hammond, in Jurassic Park he recreated ancient life on earth from the blood of the terrible lizards preserved in the stomachs of mosquitoes – themselves really just another kind of flea –suspended forever in amber.

Evolution is often imagined to only produce improvement, but it’s not quite so simple as that. Heritable traits also include parasitic instincts as well as evolutionary dead ends. We may ourselves be nearing the bottom of a hereditary cul-de-sac right now; certainly the sum total of current human development seems to be directed anywhere but towards progress. The nasty biting buggers in the Middle East are bad enough, but we ignore the nibblers among our own numbers at our peril.

There is a growing belief that human evolution can occur over much shorter timescales than previously supposed; possibly within a few generations when it concerns the development of the brain. And evolutionary psychologists suggest a plausible genetic basis for morality. Given that the ultimate success of all genetic mutations depends on their survival and reproduction rates, rather than on any universal sense of right or wrong, it’s a short logical hop to conclude that a moral compass which concludes that ‘work is for mugs’ is on track to conquer the world. If the British welfare system is anything to go by it’s a valid theory.

Fortunately – and fortunately is how I see it – as the underclasses out-breed the working masses they will soon get to a critical volume whereupon all the productivity in the world will be incapable of feeding them and as quickly as they rose up they will become extinct, leaving only the dwindling few with a work ethic to repopulate the planet. In millennia to come the strange Age of the Human Parasites, when Doleysaurs stalked the land, will be mere history and only the scattered, fossilised remains of KFC Bargain Buckets will attest to their former ubiquity.

Look... it's like a tiny Chav, in aspic!

But what goes around, comes around as they say and as Swift’s original words attest: “The vermin only teaze and pinch, their foes superior by an inch. So, naturalists observe, a flea has smaller fleas that on him prey; And these have smaller still to bite 'em… And so proceed ad infinitum.” In a future world we may never see the like of dear Dickie Attenborough again but pray that there is also no future John Hammond to recreate the dominant human life form of the twenty-first century from an amber-preserved bed bug.

Monday, 25 August 2014

Lancing the Boyle

Frankie Boyle thinks the BBC should sack Jeremy Clarkson, describing him as a cultural tumour. Tumour is, of course, one of Boyle’s favourite words because it arouses quite deep feelings of disgust and revulsion, as do his mentions of celebrities’ sick children and jokes about cancer victims and aids sufferers. It doesn’t bother me at all, but given that a huge amount of his work is intended to cause offence, which is then (usually quite rightly) brushed off as an attack on his freedom of speech, his anti-Clarkson stance is curious.

Maybe it’s envy? After all, JC makes £Gazillions for himself and the BBC and is imitated all around the world while Frankie Boyle is popular in… parts of Scotland. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy a Boyle rant as much as the next primitive, misogynist, misanthrope cave beast but it’s an odd request that people a bit like him, but way less offensive, should be cast out. Maybe it’s all just out of context but hey, that’s never been a problem when publicity is what you’re after. I wonder if he has a tour to plug?

But isn’t it staggering, how far we’ve, er, staggered in a couple of generations from a strait-laced world in which everybody knew the form, to this weird, dysfunctional shambles of a society where nobody seems to know how to behave towards anybody else any more? Back in the black-and-white days, without any hint of ‘citizenship’ training, we British knew how to address our elders, our betters, our equals, our family, our peers and even our queers without suffering any more than a clip around the ear for taking the occasional liberty.

Now, however, the offendotrons lurk around every corner. Children berate their parents for displaying what they have been taught to recognise as everyday racism. Grandparents, particularly, come in for some withering looks from the holier-than-thou Midwich cuckoos sent to denounce them. Precocious kids were ever in need of a twatting, but now their naïve observations are likely to be given every credence by the constabulary; this can only ever make things worse. It would be funny if it weren’t so tragic.

Comedians do, of course, make their living by voicing the hitherto unvoiced thoughts of their followers, by exaggerating life and by reducing, to the absurd, the serious aims of those which whom they disagree. Thus, to a ‘further left than Chomsky’ Frankie Boyle, the Tories and all who have sympathy with them are baby-eating monsters, while Hamas are victims of Israeli oppression. This is the eternal problem with the left – their brains appear to have evolved to forever see things in only black and white.

Frankie Boyle - a bit of a cunt

I suppose you just have to choose your allegiances in life. For my part, the choice between an evening with the socially cancerous Jeremy Clarkson and Jim Davidson as opposed to, say, thirty seconds in the company of the mono-rationally viral Frankie Boyle and Marcus Brigstocke is a pretty easy decision. I’d go with the Technicolor brains every time.

Sunday, 24 August 2014

Jumping Jihadis

So, ninety percent of the electorate don’t bother to turn out to vote for a new Inter-Planetary Press and Police Complaints Commissionaire, Maître-Doorman, or whatever the fuck they were being asked to select. Has it occurred to politicians that nobody really gives a fig any more? Maybe the muslims are on the right track after all; democracy is dead as a door nail and trying to use it to legitimise an election which can now be won by the pitching up of Mam, Dad, Uncle Kev and Aunty Dor’ at the polling booth of a Thursday evening is as valid as pretending Popes can perform miracles.

It’s all very well organising things in accordance with the will of the majority, but let’s be frank, the majority couldn’t give a fuck what happens just so long as they can get off their tits of a weekend and have their battle scars patched up by the NHS free, gratis and for nothing, thank you very much. In fact, given the proven ability of committees to fuck things up far more effectively than any one, sane decision-maker, effectively making the entire country a committee of millions it’s a wonder anything ever gets done at all…

Or looked at another, rational, way, it’s no wonder at all that we’re in the depths of shit we’re currently wading through. The Middle East badly need a few ruthless dictators back in power to quell the squabbling medievals; somehow the world was a more peaceful place when people were left alone to persecute each other in their own places of origin, rather than be allowed to swan about inflicting confusion and bloodshed in the name of cultural enrichment.

Clearly, humans do not play well with other children and must be separated for their own good. The new Terror ASBOs are not going to do that. They want an islamic state, then let them have one and make them stay there, because the only way of controlling the jihadists is by the methods they use to control others. And given that in a supposedly civilised country we don’t do that sort of thing, surely our only answer is to export our national HR problem by outsourcing it to where they can.

The good news is that it turns out islam isn’t a one-size fits all deal. Despite their insistence that the one true allah is merciful, there must be several such allahs, for each one favours a different type of warped superstition and appears to decree death to the rest: Sunni-Delights, Shia LaBeoufs, Wahhabi Waffles, Sufi Succotash the various allahs preside over a marvellously divided bunch of misfits. So, this gives me an idea.

Allah Twatbar!

Round ‘em up, divide them into their sectarian groups, load them into troop planes and fly them all back to not quite where they belong. Give them a choice of parachute or not, but either way, drop them over a different group’s territory. Do the same with all the hysterical lefty supporters of Hamas – they can choose which type of lovely islam they want to live with. Repeat until the only muslims who remain in Britain are the hitherto silent and largely mythical ‘moderate’ ones and all of the lefties have shut the fuck up. I can see no downsides apart from the loss of a few thousand parachutes.