Wednesday, 20 August 2014

First World Problems

In a continuing theme, I know nothing. Seriously, not a thing. For a start, I don’t know how people can remain employed in jobs they clearly can’t do. Oh, you want examples? Well, let’s see: Every religious leader on the planet, despite centuries, nay millennia, of playing on the patience of their sheep flocks has failed to ever produce a single shred of evidence to suggest their own office is based on verifiable fact and not mere superstition. Their followers are even worse – if you can call being a follower a job – they seem to willingly believe all that shit… and then kill people to prove it. So, that’s religion for you; got that pegged.

Then there’s politics; no politician, it seems, has ever managed to successfully bring about even a small fraction of all the promises he/she made. Worse still, in opposition they hypocritically oppose every single one of their own policies now being enacted by the incumbent administration and they routinely slag off every government minister for displaying all the same weaknesses, predilections and weird foibles they themselves displayed in office. This appears to apply to every politician everywhere, all the time and currently David Cameron doesn't know what our foreign policy is towards... er... anywhere. (He isn't even all that convincing about Scotland, never mind the Middle East.)

Owen Jones and Laurie Penny are wrong, of course, about every single thing they say, every single thing they think and every single thing they do and yet they still attract willing acolytes, some of whom really ought to know, in their heart of hearts, they are being taken in by nursery-level, playground polemic. And I must be doing something very wrong indeed because, try as I might, my own lack of knowledge has thus far failed to secure me a comfortable living, being paid for displaying my own ignorance in open, in full public view and in defiance of all the facts.

Climatologists know nothing about the weather, economists know nothing about commerce, stockbrokers rarely get rich without illegal insider knowledge and in Hollywood, according to William Goldman “Nobody knows anything.” And only this week Formula One has boldly announced a new racing driver who doesn’t even have a sodding driving licence. How do any of these people hold their heads up high? Bollocks to the notion of self-esteem, a bit of self-awareness might not go amiss.

And then there are the even bigger issues; the human problems that all of a sudden western governments dare not acknowledge. When the First World doesn’t even know how, or when, to control its own borders how can we possibly be safe from all the ‘infestations’ that are carried by humans; disease, hunger, ignorance… Ebola? We’re fucked. Feeding the multitudes? We’re fucked. islam? We’re definitely fucked… before or after beheading it makes no difference, islam is a clear threat to everything civilised.

Turd World
Turd World Problems!

There just isn’t a problem out there that simply can’t be solved. Human ingenuity can fix pretty much anything it sets its mind to. We can put a computer in every pocket with the power to bring about real change, improve real lives. But the biggest problem of all is, do we have the will to solve those that really matter? I don’t think we do. I may be stupid, I may know nothing but I reckon the ‘Third World’ war has already started.