Saturday, 28 July 2018
Everybody loves a good conspiracy theory; Dan Brown and other such sensationalist authors have made fortunes from peddling tales of outlandish plots, secret societies, centuries-old mysteries and good old myths and legends. It’s stirring stuff, especially the dénouement when in that last race to The End we discover that we have been deceived from the beginning and the kind old professor/grandmother/ protector-of-the-faith is really the guiding hand of the whole illicit enterprise... and in the final act the Nazi gold is once again lost, paving the way for a sequel and revealing that even now we know we were fooled, we’re always ready to fall for another bout of deceit.
On the BBC news this morning, sinister dealings are revealed, that targeted social media campaigns are disseminating hated and fomenting division and ‘damaging democracy’. Naturally, such underhand perversions of the natural order are at the behest of the Russians and the Leave cartel. Did you know, by the way, of the dark masters of the Brexit Syndicate? Oh yes; I couldn’t read to the end for laughing but I wouldn’t be surprised if the fingerprints of giant space lizards are all over those shenanigans. Turns out – allegedly – that all this disorganised, uncoordinated bumbling is really part of the plot, disguising the slick operation beneath. I say, give them all Equity cards!
But back to the hate news; is it for real, or is it that – the way I see it – that humans are just like that and they rarely play nice when not face to face? Isn’t the simpler explanation just that once wedded to an idea or even better, an ideology, you seek out that which confirms your bias? We all do it. I see the left as being the side most likely to engage in threats and violence. The left assume that only those of the right would be so dastardly. Strikes me it’s not ‘internet hate’ we should be educating kids about but that humans are a pretty shitty species. But I guess the truth can be hard to swallow.
The problem with deep conspiracy is another aspect of human nature; we can’t keep secrets. We are atrocious at it. If we really wanted to give our kids an advantage in life we would teach them how to be good liars. Then they could enter politics and happily de-couple their cognitive dissonance as they simultaneously cut the ribbon on the new school even as they pressed the button for the demolition of another. They could cut funding for the NHS while cheerily announcing an increase. And they could repeatedly tell the public the lie that Ted Heath made it perfectly clear that joining the Common Market meant loss of sovereignty.
If there is one conspiracy worthy of the name it is the grand conspiracy to cut off the head of the nation state and in particular this nation state. Many warned of this, but the official line was to deny it, to obfuscate, to change the subject and to point to trade. But look, we’ll be rich! But we’re not rich are we? Are you? Only relatively recently has it been clear we no longer steer our own course, but it has been represented as an agreed end state when it was never anything of the kind.
Leave overspent during the referendum? Oh, fuck off – Remain’s champions have lied to the public for decades and continue to lie. Most people must be able to see that David Cameron offered a referendum only because he had been backed into an electoral corner and only because he was convinced he could win it. It was supposed to have been won by Remain and a 52/48 result would have absolutely sealed the deal; there would have been no marches, no targeted ‘hate’ campaigns. We would – as a state – have meekly donned our shackles, continued boarding the EU galley and grabbed an oar.
If you want more, here are a few links to feed your curiosity: