Out-Klassed

What is wrong with people? Well, according to some airhead moron on Radio 4 the other day it seems we harbour the pernicious social disease of – are you ready - Unconscious Bias. So bad is the epidemic that the BBC is way ahead of the game and forked over handfuls of your licence fee to be re-educated earlier this year. Now it appears big businesses have fallen for the snake oil chicanery and are investing heavily in ‘experts’ to deliver this kind of bullshit.

“So,” she said (Of COURSE it’s a she – Diversity Consultants are too irony-blind to even notice the utter bland uniformity of their practitioners.) “So, imagine a gay man.” A pause for effect followed by, “Now imagine he is eighty years old… and married.” At this point you could almost picture the upper lip of Jimmy-John Humphrey-Naughtie curling and quivering. “Then picture him as Japanese,” droned the drone. “If you had to alter your mental image during that process then it indicates that you have an unhealthy and potentially fatal unconscious bias.” Or some such bollocks...

Had I not got work to attend I was sorely tempted to run my car into the nearest lamppost and end it all right there and then. What? You tell me to imagine a gay man and you think the first person I should think of is not Boy George but George Takei? It takes some powerful effort of indoctrinated mind-control  to overcome all natural human instinct and play the non-judgemental automaton game. Because that is what the practitioners of this idiocy are trying to create; an army of counter-instinctive, creepy clones incapable of distinguishing talent from toss-pot, creative from crack-head. If anything the pursuit of the unicorn of diversity is more than likely to stalk only the cart horse of crap.

Then we will have the society the left truly deserve; the sort of delusional, quasi-religious mob morons who at the relevant signal will gang up on a sensible member of their own species daring to challenge a sacred living god… in this case Special Ed Miliband. When Myleene Klass took Ed to task over his knee-jerk, tax-everything, policy reflex you would think that while most people laughed, even the most diehard Labour supporters could only resort to the facepalm counter-reflex. (Couldn’t you just see that in church – Ed in the pulpit reading the scriptures and the congregation slapping their faces in response?) But no; astonishing as it seems, some people are so stick-of-rock Labour that they went on the offensive against Ms Klass with a petition to remove at least a part of her earning potential.

Oh, the irony of also reducing her tax bill. But some on the left are so blinded by their own unconscious prejudices and class/success envy they simply cannot face the truth of difference. Why can’t we have elitism? Why shouldn’t somebody who succeeds pass on to their own their wealth, their drive, their ambition? If we have a world where it isn’t possible to get ahead where is the incentive to even pull your own weight? Socialism, taken to its logical end can only ever result in a low mediocrity where any initiative is punished, any spark snuffed out.

When you put it like that I just want to smell you...

Instead, these equality and diversity goons would suppress our natural biases, our ability to pick the best side to play for, our natural tendency to pursue opportunity and success and replace it with a dull monotony of uniform; uniform action, uniform thought, uniform poverty, misery and a beige world of bland. The only people getting rich would be the party apparatchiks flying the calico flag of indifference and calling it multi-coloured, calling it diverse. Well listen to this you stupid, lefty mongs - I've thought about this and I can tell you, here and now, that there is absolutely nothing unconscious about MY bias!