When you’ve been married for years it’s difficult to keep
the flames of romance burning and like many a man, Dave was at a loss as to
what to do this Valentine’s Day. Over the years he’d deployed chocolates and
flowers, intimate dining, even several weekend breaks to Paris and Rome. But
times were hard and money was tight and he knew she’d frown on him spending any
of the money in their joint account that she had already earmarked for new
patio furniture. But as the big day approached he had an inspired thought.
One of their very first day-dates had been to the zoo
where, as teenagers discovering each other, they had both realised they were meant
to be together. They admired the plumage of the birds of paradise, laughed at
the antics of the meerkats and nervously held hands in the dark of the reptile
house. Maybe nostalgia would work in his favour? So Dave duly planned his
surprise, requesting the day off work and booking a table for lunch, with champagne
and roses. It had been a long time since they had done anything just for
themselves.
On the morning of the fourteenth of February he woke
Julie with breakfast in bed. She complained about the crumbs. He gave her a prettily arranged floral bouquet which she thought unimaginative and she positively sneered at the soppy
verse in the card he’d chosen. Dave was undeterred; surely she’d melt when
he took her on a journey down memory lane to where they had begun. He was
excited as he cajoled her to get in the car, but she was getting exasperated
because he wouldn’t tell her where they were going. As they pulled into the zoo
car park she rolled her eyes.
But Dave was excited and his enthusiasm rubbed off just
enough that she got out of the car, pulled her coat around her and reluctantly
took his hand. It was a grey, drizzly day but still Dave insisted they visited
all the old haunts. He pointed out the pair of cooing love birds as they
strolled through the tropical aviary, laughed at the antics of the bedraggled
meerkats as they peeked out of the top of their sodden burrow and he fought past
her protest to cuddle her in the dark warmth amid the collection of exotic
serpents. She wasn’t really into it so, with half an hour before their table was
booked, Dave led her to the primates enclosure.
Chimpanzees chattered excitedly as they chased each other
round their habitat. An old orang-utan sat forlornly in a tyre and over in the
corner, in a large separate enclosure, a silverback gorilla sat away from his
harem and absently groomed himself. As Dave and Julie drew near he caught their
scent and looked up with interest. They approached the wire and the gorilla
stood up and sniffed deliberately in their direction. He seemed to be looking
at Julie. Dave suggested she walked a few paces off to the left. Sure enough
the gorilla’s gaze followed her. He sniffed the air again, then placed a paw on
his crotch.
“He’s getting excited, Julie!” said Dave “Go on, blow him
a kiss!” The gorilla responded by beating his chest and again clutching at his
crotch. The unmistakable sign of his arousal was grasped in a huge paw as the
giant stared lustfully at Julie. Dave looked around, saw they were alone and
whispered to Julie to lift her top. She giggled and did so. The gorilla stood
up and pounded at his chest with both paws, his now fully erect penis in clear
view. Julie was enjoying herself for the first time in the day and blew more kisses at
the beast.
Who loves ya,baby?
Dave looked on as Julie got ever more flirtatious with
the great king of the jungle and he in turn got ever more excited until suddenly the mighty gorilla hurled himself at the enclosure and before she could get away managed to
thrust an enormous leathery paw right through the wires and between the bars. The
gorilla clutched Julie tightly to him, his hot breath snorting in her ear. She looked
to Dave for help, but he just smiled and held up his hands in a gesture of
amused helplessness. “Don’t worry darling” he said, “Just do what you always
do. Tell him you’ve got a headache.”
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