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Wednesday, 1 May 2013
Get Rich Quick!
A new month and after a very exciting politically bloggy period I bring you exciting news that could change my life forever. Yes, that’s true. This could change my life forever.
Have you ever wondered how you would spend a million pounds? Two million? More? Well this could be my only conundrum from now on if you follow my one-step plan to riches. That’s right. My one-step plan to riches involves – you’ve got it – just one step. Have you ever wondered how you could get rich in one step? I have and I’ve found the answer. Read on to discover my secret.
Did you ever buy anything you wish you hadn’t? Of course you did; we all did! Did you ever buy anything you thought would bring you joy, freedom from pain, freedom from worry… or riches? Of course you did; we all did! By the end of this blog you will know why they didn’t work and you will learn my one-step plan to riches.
Sounds too good to be true? Read on to discover how I plan to get rich in just one step. That’s right, my one-step plan to riches is all you will ever need to make me rich beyond my wildest dreams… in just one step. Don’t delay, read on and discover my one-step plan to riches today. A new direction for a new month; you owe it to yourself; you owe it to me.
My one-step plan for riches will free you from the yoke of gullibility that has held you down all your life. Ask yourself this: how much money, time and effort have you expended in your life on any of the following in the forlorn hope they would bring you joy, freedom from pain, freedom from worry… or riches?
Aromatherapy, crystal healing, reiki, copper bracelets, acupuncture, lucky heather, lucky rabbits feet, women’s magazines full of astrology and shit, men’s magazines full of gadgets and shit, power balance bracelets, self-help books, amulets, diet plans, political parties, exercise plans, breast enlargement, penis enlargement, scratch cards, sweepstakes, gym membership and all other formulations of snake oil? All those false promises of success, popularity, happiness, health, freedom from pain or riches. How much disappointment have you suffered because – get this – none of them work? Well no more.
If you embrace my one-step plan to riches you will get exactly what I promise. My one-step plan to riches will set you free. Sign up now to receive the following immediate benefits: My one-step plan to riches promises you absolutely nothing whatsoever. That’s right; no false promises, no false hope just one simple-step to riches. Are you ready to change my life forever?
Send me £5 today and I guarantee that by return of post I will give you absolutely bugger-all. Unlike all the others I promise to provide you with no benefit at all. I also promise you will hear no more from me – absolutely guaranteed or your money back! (Back in my pocket, that is) Yes. My one-step plan to riches pledges to improve your lot by not one jot. (Seriously, what do you expect for a fiver?) This is the only get-me-rich plan that will absolutely guarantee to do for you exactly what it promises. Sweet. F. A.
Don't delay - pay me today!
The small print.
My one-step plan to riches promises you absolutely nothing. You agree to part with real money for no return whatsoever. No liability is accepted for any incidental benefit such as feeling good about your charitable act; this has nothing to do with the one-step plan to riches and merely reflects some residual gullibility on your part. You give me your money and I give you nothing in return. Any subsequent Lottery win is pure dumb luck and has nothing to do with the one-step pan to riches... unless you fancy sharing it with me.