But the committee was not amused. A committee was promptly convened to discuss how much more effectively they could waste resources and line the pockets of a few more grievance lawyers and came up with a charge of racism against the four.
But, wait a minute, you say. Surely the racism is committed by those who see a picture of a monkey and immediately associate it with the black committee member? I never thought I'd be in the position of defending a bunch of smelly, hippy, leftie-types but, by jingo, I think they are most certainly in the right. (Fortunately, for my conscience, I'm defending some lefties against some other lefties, so that's okay.)
But, for the record, some black people do indeed look a bit like some primates, just as some white people look a bit rodenty. Some fat people look porcine, hairy people can look a bit like a Sasqwatch and owners of pit bull terriers are virtually impossible to distinguish from their moronic lead-sharer. (I leave you to decide which is which - they all look the same to me.) For heaven's sake, to Reginald Iolanthe Perrin, his mother-in-law looked like a hippopotamus, yet you all just laughed at that, you, you vile hippopotamists!
For crying out bollocky-bastarding loud haven't you all got better things to be doing, Unison? I bet your members are over the frigging moon at having to fork out, once again for your knee-jerk, offence-taking stupidity. To discriminate on grounds of race is wrong. To remark that you can't see your black friend in the dark unless he smiles is what we used to call 'a joke'. But to pretend that - against the evidence - the Emperor is concealing his modesty is Orwellian doublethink.