A Patriotic Rant

Nicola Sturgeon has said that should the UK do the ‘unthinkable’ and vote to leave the European Union, Scotland would be better off leaving our 300-year union and becoming an ‘independent’ EU member. Quite apart from the oxymoronic nature of that statement – swapping one level of dependency for another, this would make Scotland a foreign power against which a border would need to be erected and enforced. Hadrian was right.

But, on the good side, a significant proportion of those of us in England who would be rid of the EU’s unhelpful restraint on freedom and development, would be equally delighted to see the back of a country whose denizens have long hated us while taking every penny they could wring out of us. It has been suggested that both the Welsh and the Scots, if the UK was divided thus for the referendum, would overwhelmingly vote to stay in. One has to ask why, given that both populations have been allowed for years to be fiercely nationalistic even in their socialism, while the English don’t even have their own anthem, let alone their own parliament.

Bring it on, I say. No, bring it – the fuck – on. I grew up English. By the time I hit my late teens I had to learn to say British and indeed, when I finally got a real passport (a blue one, of course) it told the world I was a Brit. Well, I want independence from Britain, too. I want to be English again and no longer have to care for the poor and under-nourished of other nations. I say ‘care’, like I ever did and I say ‘under-nourished’ because for all of my life as a 'British' man I’ve had to listen to the constant demands from more stridently nationalistically proud folk holding out begging bowls and demanding that English taxpayers give ever more.

So, here’s a plan. Release Wales from its status as a mere principality and let it self-rule entirely. Let the Scots, likewise, be free to roam ‘aboot’ their glens and bonnie braes and let them both be entirely sovereign nations, free to sell their sovereignty for the Euro-shilling. Allow all Scots and Welsh and Northern Irish who wish to leave the EU reside in England and naturalise as English, then get those borders rebuilt; Hadrian’s Wall to be relocated to the current border, Offa’s Dyke to be extended and fortified the full distance. (There’s already a handy proper border between Wales and Scotland and Ireland anyway). THEN hold the referendum.

If we can’t get British independence from the EU, let’s put all our efforts into establishing English independence. In effect, we can start all over again. Why not? As individuals most of us will suffer changes of circumstance, both good and bad, in our lives, which we take advantage of or rise above. Is there any reason why we can’t do that as a country? Forget the European Union, forget any union. Vote for independence, vote to leave. “Cry God for Harry, England, and Saint George!'