Wednesday 6 May 2015

Just Kipping?

Yesterday morning, on the Today programme, I heard Nick Clegg described as the most abused man in British politics. I suppose in BBC-Land that would ring true, given that in their closed world Nigel Farage simply does not exist if they shut their eyes and chant loudly enough. In truth the kind of people who make up the majority of the Beeb’s staffers could quite cheerfully insist that he is a figment even as they hold their nose and conduct a constantly interrupted interview with the leader of the third most popular party in the country. What, somebody other than Holy Labour actually listening to 'ordinary people'?  It. Does. Not. Compute. There is also plenty of anecdotal evidence of huge porky pies being told on doorsteps by activists of other parties and a failure to prompt for Ukip by polling organisations. What is everybody so scared of?


In support of the establishment thesis that Ukip is insignificant and thus by inference so are the opinions of those who will vote for them, the general election media coverage in the last 48 hours is steadfastly playing down any Kippery, unless of course it plays into the narrative that Ukip supporters are all unhinged, frothy-mouthed racists obsessed with and blaming every single ill on immigrants. Yet Ukip have categorically stated that it is not immigrants but uncontrollable, high-volume immigration, stemming from our membership of a political union that nobody was ever asked to join that is the root cause of our inability to arrange our own affairs sensibly. Hence the name; the United Kingdom Independence Party and not the United Kingdom Darkies Go Home Party.

Given that all the other outfits are similarly campaigning on stretch in the NHS, the ‘crisis’ in education and school places, a lack of housing, the downward pressure on wages and our creaking infrastructure, is it really too outlandish to surmise that a greater population than our society can comfortably accommodate may be contributory to every single one of those problems? And if – I hesitate to use the word - ‘mature’ parties like the Tories and Labour are insisting they will bring immigration under control despite the failure of both of them to actually do so, why is it that when Ukip flag up that particular failure this is taken as proof positive of their ‘vile’ racial hatred?

Fruitcakes, loonies, ignorant, ill-educated, racist rabble? There are poor spellers, bigots, verbally incontinent morons and deluded fools voting for every political party in the land, statistically in easily greater numbers for red and blue than for purple. Some idiot children will vote Labour because Russell Brand told them to, some others will vote Green… because Russell Brand told them to. But only the ‘Kippers are racist? Maybe they just got fed up of voting for more of the same, but if it’s racism you really want, look no further than those cuddly third-world communities so beloved of one party in particular.

I will vote for exactly who I bloody well want, young man!
Do fuck off back home, dear...

I don’t have any such misty-eyed recollections as John Major’s “long shadows on county cricket grounds, warm beer, green suburbs, dog lovers, and old maids cycling to Holy Communion through the morning mist.” I know it wasn’t like that for the majority. But I do have very real memories of growing up in what felt like the best country in the world. The country that had saved - actually saved - the world from Hitlerian fascism. Whoever you vote for, surely wanting to prevent us 'sleepwalking' into becoming just another EU sub-regional backwater is a legitimate ambition to recognise and not just to slap down with hysterical slurs. Is Britain just 'Kipping? Or is it waking up?

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