You have a vote. Just the one. A single, solitary voice
in a cacophonous sea of sibilant pleas. A white noise of need with every
breathy wish slightly different from the next. To each his need, goes the
Marxist aphorism, but my needs are not your needs and yours not mine, so we’ll
settle for something in between, if you please.
You didn't always have a vote and that was a shame. But
if you thought that being given one solved that problem, think again. Because
you may as well not bother scribing your ‘X’ unless you understand what it
might do. Disraeli was against expansion of the franchise, believing an
increase in voters would bring into parliament "a horde of selfish and
obscure mediocrities, incapable of anything but mischief". Wise
words.
The best you can do with your single vote is to add it to
others in a way that reduces the number of selfish and obscure mediocrities.
How’s that working out for you, voters? Since at least the nineteen seventies there
has been an upsurge of that very type of parliamentary member; the opportunist
career politico, elected exactly as Disraeli foresaw. Now it’s rare to find any
other kind.
Being a good leader does not mean being popular. Few successful
bosses are liked by all their employees and those who are are rare indeed. Everybody
delights in the tawdry stories that portray world figures in a dim light. In
Britain particularly, the schadenfreude runs deep in our psyche. So when it
comes to electing our leaders in the national pissing contest we call a general
election we really should avoid, at all costs, casting our vote on popularity;
that’s how Nick Clegg got in. (Don’t worry, he’ll be off to Brussels quite soon.)
Whoever gets in has to be on the side of Britain, because
once they’re in our votes no longer matter. We were sold to Europe in 1973
without a vote being cast. Binding promises to give us a say in our
relationship with the EU have been broken. Treaties are signed without consent
and wealth is plundered at the whim of unelected officials. If you think the
last point is exaggerated, put yourself in the place of a Cypriot saver - as their banks
open today for the first time in two weeks – being told how much of their own
money they may see.
You think a vote for labour will maintain your welfare
lifestyle? Look around you. What wealth we have will be driven away as closer
European integration means we have to spread the love ever more thinly. Your
life will only get poorer as the population grows in the wrong way. You think a
vote for the Conservatives will give you a vote on Europe? Don’t bank on
cast-iron Dave’s hollow pledge; he has already said he will fight to keep us
in. You like the Libdems? Then you’re not wise enough to have a vote.
Which leaves UKIP. Of course they won’t form the next
government. Of course they don’t have all the answers. Of course they are not
all uniformly attractive and popular people. Of course there are one or two
nutters in there – me for a start - that goes for any party. But think about this, my vote-wielding
chums. The other parties are suddenly turning nasty. The trash talk before the
fight has started. To the LibLabCon troika, UKIP is the most unpopular smell in
the air right now. They must be doing something right.
