Wednesday, 6 November 2013

Now go and tidy your room

What short memories people have and what propensity to believe soothing lies. People will still tend to select their supposed local representative based on tribal loyalty to those lies rather than on any firm factual or observational basis and some will abstain altogether from the democratic process, further entrenching the stale, safe-seat stasis which means the lies will keep on coming. Lies such as the Living Wage campaign.

If you’re going to lie to people you might as well go for big ones. And one of the biggest category of lie available to politicians and individuals alike is the fantasy that you know how the economy works or will work. For instance, Cameron and Co have stuck with Plan A throughout all the time the Eds urged more of the borrowing that has cumulatively resulted in a national debt which will never be repaid. Now that growth is suddenly, conveniently, being seen, both sides are claiming victory; one that we got there in the end, the other that we could have got there quicker.

The living wage – it sounds such a noble idea, doesn’t it? – is just another way to draw the battle lines. On the one hand increasing wages will cause a spiral of inflatory prices rises, force businesses to close or employ more illegals, putting more people out of work and adding to the welfare bill. On the other hand people will be gloriously lifted out of poverty, making ends meet for the first time in years, creating magical prosperity which will fuel higher individual spending, thus creating more jobs and reducing the welfare bill.

Neither side knows what would really happen and both sides will claim evidence, whether or not living wage proposals go ahead, that they were right and more importantly, that the other side was wrong. Who you support, no matter what you like to think, will depend on your beliefs more than your unique insight into the mysterious workings of man and money. Thus the fiscally thrifty will align themselves with the worthies on the right and the profligate will join the queues for more pocket money on the left. The net result will be, as it always is, that those who can adapt to circumstances will get by and those who can’t will fall by the wayside; no amount of manipulation of the figures will disguise the reality that we will never all thrive. It’s never happened yet.

So, no wonder the kids are confused. Some adopt the tribal loyalty of their parents’ clan while others utterly reject it and make a dash to join the enemy. Some are so confused they end up in the LibDem camp, forever wondering what they stand for and still more will flock to join the incoherent ranks of Russell Brand and his Million Mask March cronies, peddling a rambling narrative of emotive, fluffy bullshit.

Hilariously contradictory, this rag-taggle army of evangelical, revolutionary, hippy, libertarian anarchists demand the government does something to make it all better, just so long as they don’t have to vote for it. I suppose when you’ve done as many pharmaceuticals as Brand it really is as simple as dragons and unicorns, pirates and princesses and oh look – a squirrel!

He's not the Messiah - he's a very naughty boy!

The trouble is, they don’t know what it is they really want; just, like children everywhere, that it’s not what they’ve got. So having made a bit of noise - stick it to the man, power to the people, blah, blah, blah - and kicked up a fuss they will shuffle off home to mummy and daddy when it gets cold or they’ve run out of booze. Meantime the majority of their peers are busy making themselves employable and bothering with neither the manipulative lies of politicians nor the na├»ve rabble-rousing, incontinent fictions of a nob in tight trousers. The winner, as ever, the status quo.  Politics is no place for kids.


  1. Oh stop with the nonsense of businesses closing if they have to pay a living wage? FGS! If you're not prepared to pay someone fairly/ don't expect to employ them. Do the bloody job yourself!! Ppl are not slaves.They're not fodder just because they don't have the ability or wherewithal to set up in business for themselves? And, moreover, why shouldn't we expect the govt. to help? It's what they're there for. We elected them to do a job for us? Not their greedy, grasping, corrupt, self-serving selves! With attitudes like this, no wonder they get away with so much. I despair..

    1. Interesting that you are so forthright that you don't want people to know who you are. Businesses will be hamstrung, low skill workers required for many small businesses with rocket so they will hire fewer people or have to get rid of some altogether. Instead of investing in the business to make it go they will tread water.

      Even an idiot must be able to see that if you increase the cost of production you increase the cost to the consumer. In other words the "living wage" will simply increase the cost of living. Who will suffer the most? Those of use in the middle, working hard for an average salary on no benefits at all.

      You want to earn more go and fucking earn it, you are entitled to squat!

    2. Nice one, Rob. Fucking commies, eh?

    3. You betray an absolute lack of understanding. Your anti-business 'high ground' and belief that you are 'entitled' is a joke.

      By the way, it's NOT the government helping. It's those of us who work bloody hard and claim nothing.

    4. Dear Anonymous,

      Just because you can’t read, or refused to read the two sides to the ‘living wage’ argument, summarised in paragraph three, doesn’t mean you’re necessarily a bad person. It rather proves the point of the piece really: I thank you for your contribution.

      Having positioned yourself firmly on the left – big state, big welfare society, high tax, borrow and spend, eat the rich and up the workers – you probably don’t really understand how business, how anything to do with humans, actually works. You would prefer there to be no choice and for government to make all the important decisions for you. There are plenty of escapees from former Communist countries who would happily explain to you how that works out.

      Nobody has to work for less than they feel they deserve and in return no employer has an obligation to pay more than the job is worth. You’re right, of course, that beggars can’t be choosers, which is the main reason that many British firms are so grateful for the choice your style of thinking has given them, to wit: employ an ill-educated, attitude-heavy, entitlement-obsessed, British school-leaver who thinks you owe him a living, or take on a polite, eager and efficient Eastern European who is grateful for the job and will work for less?

      You stick with your beggar’s philosophy and I’ll carry on with my choices. It’s not a competition, but I bloody well know who’s winning.

      PS: Say Hi to Russell when you see him!

  2. You patronising lot! I've no idea who Russell is. And nor have I ever in my life claimed benefits!! Who the hell are you to assume you know me? Whatismore I'm neither left, nor right, nor in the middle. But moreover sick to death of the utter selfishness/ self-centredness/ and self-righteousness that passes for humanity today..

    1. Whatirritatesmemostofallisyourinabilitytouseakeyboard

    2. Then, Anonymous, you have NEVER understood humanity, today, in the past and for as long as the species survives.

      You were the one who nailed your colours firmly to the touchy-feely mast. If you're neither left nor right as you claim (although clearly left by all that you have said) then how do you vote? Wait... I get it it; your brand of sanctimony is better than other people's brand of minding their own business, right? Then you must be a Limp Dem!

      What fun!