Dogs of War

So, "Occupy" are claiming a success in their latest stunt - the chaining up of wheelchairs in Oxford Circus to highlight the plight of those on disability living allowance. Interesting that they are willing to restrain the free movement of those who really need it; perhaps in support of benefits for single mothers they could set up a streetside abortion operation? Or they could organise a sit-in to demonstrate the ardent desires of those claiming Jobseekers Allowance. Irony is clearly not their strong point, especially when you see what anagrams can be made from their Twitter account, @UKuncut.

I have a dodgy crystal ball with which to predict the eventual outcome of this latest class war; dodgy in that it only shows the past, yet curiously reliable in its efficacy. You see, there will always be underdogs and they will always be at a disadvantage, so they will always want more - that's human nature - so they will agitate until those with the means give a little, dole out a few concessions and then carry on as before. The penny never really drops for these class war-yers (as they say in the States) that once they've got what they want they de-mob and leave the struggle to other have-nots in their turn. Of course we're all in it together, but it's a bit nippy out and I'm all right, Jack.

Naturally the hard-done-by can always rely on the support of their preferred political party, because there's no way any labour politician, a Miliband, say, would try and avoid paying his dues; that would be hypocritical. And you'd never ever see a die-hard trades unionist, a Prescott for example, ditching his comrades, taking ermine and sitting in the House of Lords. Soli-fucking-darity, brothers!

Class war is natural, it's a human instinct to do better, but therein lies the contradiction. It is never 'class' war, but merely the short-term, opportunistic banding together of the under-trodden until they get a bit of improvement. With few exceptions, those who move upwards also leave the field of battle. Thanks to Andy Mort for reminding me this morning of a quote from George Orwell's North and South: "You cannot have an effective trade union of middle-class workers, because in times of strikes almost every middle-class wife would be egging her husband on to blackleg and get the other fellow’s job."

And you should thank goodness that it is this way because a true class war would always be won by the right-wing, the 'haves'. Sure, the left may have the 'moral high ground' and maybe even the weight of troops on the ground. But the right will be able to afford tanks.

Have a lovely Sunday.